Thursday, June 07, 2007

Mid*Life Metamorphosis

Hey, everyone.

I'm hoping this message finds you basking in thoughts of happiness, creativity and bliss! I'm hoping that something I say today will resonate with you and help you come to a conclusion that inspires action to go forward with your dreams.

Well, a LOT has changed for me personally since I last wrote, which is basically the reason why that was the last time I've written.

You know how they say that when it rains, it pours? Well, I've gotten a heavy downpour on me during these last few months. I must admit that I've caused these changes on myself and it just seemed like a cycle of other changes that are directly affected by the previous one.

I finally took control of my life and started living for ME. Along with this, it seems that when you want to change things about yourself and your life, the people closest to you seem to resent those changes, or that they go through some type of metamorphosis of their own. Why must I apologize for what I want to do with MY life? Why must it seem as though I'm disrupting their lives too? Why is it wrong because I don't want to do what you are doing with YOUR life?

I've had some realizations come to me, with the help of a very close friend that is. In spite of going through the loss of his parent, he still had the patience to stick with me and believe that I can help him succeed in music. His success is inevitable though because he truly believes it. I'm taking a lot of cues from him, he's a great influence and a very spiritual teacher, in his own right.

It's true when they say that until you confront the fact that you have a problem or that a change is needed, you will not be able to do anything about it. Some of us are afraid of change...the very word makes some people cringe. I've had to learn to deal with things that have been habits for a long time, but certainly were not serving me nor my purpose. I've had some "tough" love administered to me over the last 6 months but I finally realized that I wasn't listening and just being stubborn. There is a difference between hearing and listening, you know? A BIG difference. It's funny how you begin to "wake up" once you step back and take notice of the movie of your life.

As an actor in the movie, you certainly can't see what others see. Your portrayal of what's going on around you makes sense to you because you are in the moment, you are acting out each scene according to the "script" you've been given. The script contains lines given to you by your parents, your teachers, your mentors, your elders and every one else that plays a part in your life. As a spectator, you see a plethora of other concepts that the director is trying to show you about the actors and what's going on in the scenes. It is necessary to be both at appropriate times because it can be overwhelming when the actor doesn't get a break.

Life is a contact sport. It doesn't come with a rule book, but it does often come pre-packaged with thoughts, values and beliefs that don't necessarily have anything to do with YOUR experience nor your purpose. You can easily fall into the trap of being someone else and not being true to yourself. In the moment when you realize that you have questions that "shouldn't be asked" or thoughts that are "against the norm," then and only then can you begin to experience true freedom. Although I've always gone against the status quo in the music business, I never practiced that same principle in my personal life and as a result, I am finally finding out what it truly means to be free.

No, it's NEVER too late to find the truth, so keep on searching for it. And no, it's not going to be an easy journey, either. The road to the truth has many enemies and your EGO is often your worst one. Your Ego wants to be the center of attention. It wants to be right about everything. It can't make mistakes and it doesn't like to be embarrased. It is selfish and self-serving. It is very controlling and talks the loudest. It acts as if it is the only thing you need to have and to listen to. It can be very vicious in determining what to think and feel about things.

These characteristics I described are NOT in my personality, but it seems I've been acting out these traits for quite some time. It feels like being bound in a torturing space of life, especially when you know that you are not being the person you really are. This same thing may be happening with a lot of you...and you know what?

It's okay...

...ONCE you realize what is going on. You CAN change it. You CAN change your life, WHENEVER you want, HOW EVER you want to.

Suffice it to say that I've REALLY been going through a life-changing transition and having the courage to admit that a change was needed was the first step. I'm proud of myself. You should be proud of yourself if you've done the same at some point in your life. You have to be WILLING to want to change or otherwise, it won't work.

Have the strength and courage to humble yourself to just listen to your heart; don't always react (like your EGO teaches you to do). Seek the truth for your OWN life. You have to live it!

Peace & Blessings,

Mill Davis : )